Mother's Day!

Position Vacant: Mother

Job Description: Long-term team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work evenings, weekends, and frequent 24-hour shifts on call.

Responsibilities: Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5 to go skating. Must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars, and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Responsibilities include janitorial work throughout the facility.

Possibility for Advancement & Promotion: Virtually none.

Wages & Compensation: You will pay them, offering frequent raises and bonuses. Oddly, you will actually enjoy this reverse-salary scheme and wish you could do more.

Benefits: While no health or dental insurance, pension, paid holidays, or stock options are offered, this job supplies limitles opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A mother's love is something

that no one can explain,

It is made of deep devotion

and of sacrifice and pain,

It is endless and unselfish

and enduring come what may

For nothing can destroy it

or take that love away. . .

It is patient and forgiving

when all others are forsaking

And it never fails or falters

even though the heart is breaking. . .

It believes beyond believing

when the world around condemns,

And it glows with all the beauty

of the rarest, brightest gems. . .

It is far beyond defining,

it defies all explanation,

And it still remains a secret

like the mysteries of creation. . .

A many splendoured miracle

man cannot understand

And another wondrous evidence of God's tender guiding hand.

~Helen Steiner Rice